Fuck You Hallucinations

Try explaining to your lover; the reason why,
You can’t, won’t, or are afraid to embrace,

Standing at the foot of my bed,
A little girl in a white bloody dress,
A scary clown with only one eye,

Have you watched Children of the Corn?
Imagine your bed surrounded by children,
Holding pitchforks,

Worst part about seeing shit,
Is that when your lover tries to wrap,
His or her arms around you,
Kisses you, whispers, ‘I love you’,

Scares the shit out of me,
Not b/c I don’t love my wife,
But b/c of my hallucinations,

A young girl in a bloody white dress,
Crawls on top of me,
Same one from the Exorcist,
Whispers ‘I love you’,

Shadows run and play catch,
Try to kill walking stiffs,
Who step on side-walk cracks,

I know these visionary,
Impaired induced,
Insanity filled picturesque,
Paintings aren’t real,

But they feel real,
Smell real,
Taste real,

Simple tasks,
Clothes on hooks,
Scare me,

They move,
Turn into sea creatures,

Waking up,
Having to walk with headphones blaring,

Vibrations; music; does not shut the voices out
It only makes them bearable,

Two voices,
Distinguishable,
Kat & Dog,

Physical manifestations,
Kat is an asshole,
Speaks heresy,

‘You are an idiot’,
‘Kill yourself’,
‘Your parents killed themselves b/c of you’,
‘It was your fault’,
‘You deserve to die’,

Kat tells me to cut myself,
Will request for me to complete tasks,

Theft,
Shoplifting,
Persuades me often,
Only when I am depressed,

She knows my weaknesses,
She knows my secrets,

Imagine a Persian Egyptian Pharaoh Cat,
As described in Ancient Pyramids,

Dog rings a Hotel Clerk Bell,
Voice is soothing,
Tries to be helpful,

Reason why I’ve kept my current job,
Haven’t been fired (yet),

Sometimes mischievous,
But in a good way,

Will see a pretty man or woman,
Will ask for an erotic love poem,

As I drive along Division Street,
Dog will run alongside my car,

Try explaining to someone,
Who is ‘Normal’ that you are ‘Crazy’,

Toughest conversation,
Normally, when I tell someone,
What I see and hear,

I am told,
‘You should be institutionalized’,

What should I do?
Where should I go?

Kat or Dog?

What is normal?
What is crazy?
What is real?

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4 thoughts on “Fuck You Hallucinations

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